Talk:Battle of Saseno/GA1
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Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 14:19, 24 June 2020 (UTC)
I'll get to this shortly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 14:19, 24 June 2020 (UTC)
- Usually the phrasing is "off the coast"
- Done.
- as part of the war "during" the war
- Done.
- Venetian Navy should be capitalized just like the Royal Navy, etc. That will need to be corrected in the navy's article as well, although that's not your responsibility.
- I think that the opposite is the case: the RN is a proper name, whereas the Venetian navy is descriptive (like Byzantine navy or Fatimid navy).
- Wiki is inconsistent on this issue as Genoese Navy and Ottoman Navy are fully capitalized. My inclination is if there was a state-run navy then it should be fully capitalized, but not if the navy was an ad-hoc organization cobbled together for individual campaigns. I'll not insist on it here, but it might be something we need to bring up to try and achieve a consensus one way or another.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 18:17, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- @Sturmvogel 66: Hmmm, my take on this is that if "navy" stands not for a specific organization, but more as a shorthand for the "naval forces of a state" over a longer period of time, and these took various forms, then it should not be capitalized. For example, the Byzantine navy had several forms during its existence, sometimes with deep discontinuities (especially after 1204); the Venetian navy was not a standing force for most of its history, although its administration definitely had some more or less continuous institutional form since the 14th century or so; the Ottoman Navy on the other hand has a more or less continuous history as an organized force from its inception in the early 1400s, and since it survived into the modern era, it is also a proper designation by which it was 'officially' known. Constantine ✍ 18:37, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- Good points if we ever bring up this issue at WP:SHIPS.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 18:54, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- @Sturmvogel 66: Hmmm, my take on this is that if "navy" stands not for a specific organization, but more as a shorthand for the "naval forces of a state" over a longer period of time, and these took various forms, then it should not be capitalized. For example, the Byzantine navy had several forms during its existence, sometimes with deep discontinuities (especially after 1204); the Venetian navy was not a standing force for most of its history, although its administration definitely had some more or less continuous institutional form since the 14th century or so; the Ottoman Navy on the other hand has a more or less continuous history as an organized force from its inception in the early 1400s, and since it survived into the modern era, it is also a proper designation by which it was 'officially' known. Constantine ✍ 18:37, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- Wiki is inconsistent on this issue as Genoese Navy and Ottoman Navy are fully capitalized. My inclination is if there was a state-run navy then it should be fully capitalized, but not if the navy was an ad-hoc organization cobbled together for individual campaigns. I'll not insist on it here, but it might be something we need to bring up to try and achieve a consensus one way or another.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 18:17, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- I think that the opposite is the case: the RN is a proper name, whereas the Venetian navy is descriptive (like Byzantine navy or Fatimid navy).
- The link for the Venetian navy should be on first use.
- Added.
- commerce convoys to the Levant, which were critical to the Venetian economy. "commercial" convoys and too many Venetian in close proximity. Perhaps the "city-state's" economy?
- Changed to "the Republic's".
- Don't use summer because it's reversed below the equator; use mid-1264 instead
- Done, but for the record, I don't see the point of this rule: the date and region should make clear what part of the year we are talking about, surely?
- I think that many readers don't know that the seasons are reversed in the Southern Hemisphere, so would be caught off-guard if we were dealing with an Australian or Chilean article. So for parity's sake... MOS:SEASON
- Done, but for the record, I don't see the point of this rule: the date and region should make clear what part of the year we are talking about, surely?
- whereas in reality he took up station Perhaps "he secretly took up station"?
- Changed.
Venetianconvoy commander; we already know that the convoy was Venetian.- Done.
- Clarify or link what a panzone cargo ship and a taride are
- Good suggestion, done.
- ending the war that ended the war
- Done.
- Overlink on Genoese pounds
- Per my usual practice (and following the duplink detector tool), I don't count the lede links.
- One of these days, you'll see the wisdom of my ways! ;-) Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 18:17, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- Per my usual practice (and following the duplink detector tool), I don't count the lede links.
- In the Battle of Acre in 1258 Perhaps add: In its victories in the...
- Good suggestion, done.
- Move the note explaining what a nave is immediately after the term.
- Done.
- You use it in the lede; should you move the note there?--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 18:17, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- Per MOS, I am loath to add any footnotes in the lede. But I've tweaked it a bit. Constantine ✍ 18:25, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- You use it in the lede; should you move the note there?--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 18:17, 26 June 2020 (UTC)
- Done.
- Put the title of Dotson's article into title case.
- Done
- Images appropriately licensed.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 14:20, 25 June 2020 (UTC)
- Hi Sturmvogel 66, thanks for the review! I've addressed your points above, looking forward to anything else that might catch your attention. Constantine ✍ 17:12, 26 June 2020 (UTC)