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Talk:Andrei Kirilenko (politician)/GA2

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2nd GA Review

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Reviewer:MuZemike 17:31, 1 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I'm going through the review right now; hopefully I will finish it later today. I fixed some minor citation things I saw, and I do have a list of prose issues to go through later. One thing I have noticed right now is that, in your book citations, you need to convert your 10-digit ISBNs to 13-digit ISBNs, which is the current standard; this is a tool I use to make that conversion, which also gives you where the dashes (i.e. endashes as far as our MoS is concerned) hyphens go.

Hopefully, I will complete the review sometime later today. –MuZemike 17:31, 1 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Image issues
  • Done File:Andrei Kirilenko (politician).jpg has several things missing in its fair-use rationale. You need to verify that it is low-resolution. Also, I am assuming that there is no free equivalent that is out there (I know Russia is more strict on PD-related stuff than most other countries are). If not, then you need to indicate that no free equivalent is available.
Prose issues

If I make any errors regarding British English grammar/punctuation usage, feel free to correct me or my edits, as I am more familiar with Oxford English usage.

  • Done He graduated in the 1920s and again in the early 1930s. → Graduated where? College? For what? There is quite a bit missing there.
  • Done He contributed by improving discipline among soldiers as well as improving the material support for the troops. → "Material" is the usage of the word in the civilian context; however, in a military supply context, it is spelled "materiel".
  • Done Especially in the entire "Early life and career" section, you mention "Kirilenko" an awful lot, perhaps too much. I would replace most mentions of his last name with the pronoun "he" where applicable, except at the beginnings of paragraphs and where it may cause confusion to readers (i.e. where "he" may refer to somebody else).
  • Done He further noticed how the Afghan leadership found it in order to execute civilians because Vladimir Lenin did so. → There might be a word to two missing there, which is causing me not to understand what that sentence says.
Reworded sentence; "He also disliked it when the Afghan leadership tried to justify their murderous actions on the grounds that Vladimir Lenin did the same" -- Is it better? --TIAYN (talk) 21:45, 1 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Verifiability issue
Layout issues
  • Done Per WP:LAYOUT, Harvard and singular citations are in a separate "Notes" section, while full citations have a "References" section. I don't mind much how the references are formatted (regarding this reversion; also, if you folks prefer your way of formatting citations, that's fine with me), but we need to be consistent with that guideline/GA criterion. On a relatively minor point (i.e. I won't fight tooth/nail over it) I have also changed out the fixed column width as you begin to break compatibility with different browser configurations and viewing devices when you place it at a fixed width.
Conclusions

On hold pending the few issues noted above, mainly the image, prose and verifiability. –MuZemike 21:04, 1 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Corrections looks good. Passed. –MuZemike 21:59, 1 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]