Talk:Alonzo Clemons/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 08:48, 30 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

As the individual is still alive, I do not believe that we can justify fair use on an image of him as a free one could still be created. The image needs to be deleted.
"Clemons suffered a ..." He suffered...
"United States of America" Just United States is fine.
"the accident.[3] The accident" repetitive.
"surprising" to whom?
File:ThreeFrolockingFoals.jpg has two fields with "n.a." which are insufficient justifications for those elements of NFCC.
Why can't a free image of that sculpture be obtained? Isn't it just outside and someone could take a photo?
- Potentially yes, but I'd have to fly 10 hours to Chicago to do so, maybe the image could be replaced in time.--DasallmächtigeJ (talk) 08:07, 5 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]
It's "frolicking" by the way, check that throughout.
"using clay, or, " clay is already mentioned but not linked.
"bitumen[1][2][6] to sculpt" I wuold move those refs to the end of the clause.
"or religious symbolic" do you mean symbols?
"a bull was" no need to link common English words.
"[4][2][10] Subsequently" order.
"by galleries and shown in art museums and at exhibitions around" no need to link any of these really.
"from God and" likewise.
Spaced hyphens in ref titles should be en-dashes.
Consistent date formats in refs.
If Out Front Magazine is a magazine, it should be in italics.
Ref 6 SHOUTING.
Ref 6 it's The New York Times, not New York Times.
Ref 8, p. not pp.
Ref 10, Focus is a work.
ISBN formats should be consistent.
Category has "outsider artist" yet this phrase isn't used at all. Suggest it's mentioned with an associated referenced if the cat remains.
Where is the 1958 birth referenced?
Source says he was three or four when the accident happened...

That's about it. A lot to address here for such a brief article. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 09:18, 30 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for taking this on, I will try to address everything this weekend. DasallmächtigeJ (talk) 16:48, 30 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@The Rambling Man: Everything should be addressed by now (except the ISBN, because I have no idea how they are formatted).--DasallmächtigeJ (talk) 08:21, 5 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]

I'm still dubious that fair use applies for such a simple-to-photograph outdoor sculpture, but hey. And ISBNs should just be all 10- or 13-digits, I use ISBN.org to fix them up. However, not part of GA criteria, so I'll promote. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 11:40, 5 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]