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Talk:Albert Downing/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: ProKro (talk · contribs) 16:19, 22 July 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

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  • "team mate" – "teammate" or "team-mate"

Early life

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  • "Later he was working as a storeman for the Ellison and Duncan Company." – "He later worked..." or "Later, he worked..." (Simple past instead of past continuous.)

Military career

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  • "On 13 June he departed bound..." – "On 13 June, he departed bound..." (Comma)

Review

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GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

Article is concise and focused with only a few minor spelling and/or syntactic errors. Text is easy to read, it is interesting and engaging.

  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, no copyvios, spelling and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
    All concerns addressed. Green tickY
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
    References are few but reliable and verifiable. Green tickY
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
    Neutral Green tickY
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
    There are no copyvios or other issues. Green tickY
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

Copyvio

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One minor instance (detector); the following will need to be rephrased:

  • "being joined by five eighths Jock McKenzie, who had transferred from Wellington, and Jack O’Brien, a fullback who was a club foundation member." (close paraphrasing and/or duplicated)

Additional comments

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  • The article uses chiefly British/New Zealand English spelling, especially in news articles quotes, e.g. splendidly and vigour, so I'd suggest putting the New Zealand English tag in the article's talk page as a reminder for future editors.
  • There are few sources, aside from Papers Past, so I'd suggest archiving those recent news articles to prevent link rot.
  • Regarding dates, I'd suggest changing every date without the year indicated, to a mm/dd format (January 1,...), instead of dd/mm (1 January,...). This is more of a stylistic suggestion than anything else, really, as it is more prevalent on the majority of articles. This goes for all three articles.
  • @FunkyCanute: By all means, but keep in mind that some users might feel inclined to change it in the future. You might want to put in a heads-up for any future editors who might see it as a typo. Something like, "<! --This article uses British date format. Please, do not change it. -->", will work. ProKro (talk) 00:17, 28 July 2015 (UTC)[reply]

That's about it – an easy pass, in my opinion. As soon as the issues are addressed, the article'll be good-to-go. If you have any questions, feel free to ask. ProKro (talk) 22:15, 25 July 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for this one too! FunkyCanute (talk) 13:08, 27 July 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Congratulations! Pass ProKro (talk) 00:17, 28 July 2015 (UTC)[reply]