Talk:Acércate/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Status (talk · contribs) 20:13, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

A few issues:

"Puerto Rican" and "recording artist" → Unlink per WP:OVERLINK

Done

Lyrically, the song is telling someone to come and get closer. → Not too keen on this wording.

Any suggestion on how to reword it?

I haven't heard the song, and I'm not familiar with the artist, so I don't really know what the song is about. It just seems like a song is more about "telling someone to come and get closer". Get closer to what? — Statυs (talk, contribs) 21:33, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

These are lyrics from the song (translated) "Come and get closer, I want to feel you, your passion, your warthm."

I really can't think of how to word it... :/ But the current way of doing so just doesn't suffice. — Statυs (talk, contribs) 22:04, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Removed. — DivaKnockouts (talk) 22:10, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The song was pirated before the album was released prompting Ivy Queen and Wisin & Yandel to re-record the song. → Not too keen on this either; May I suggest: The song was leaked onto the internet prior to the album's release, which prompted Ivy Queen and Wisin & Yandel to re-record the song.

Done

It is apart of the first album released by Ivy Queen in three years for Machete Music after being with Univision Records since 2005. This is the second time where a song other than a single released by Queen has been able to chart, the first being "Dime Si Recuerdas" in 2007. Ivy Queen also recorded a song by the name "Acércate" in 2004 featuring Mikey Perfecto, it was included on her fourth studio album, Real. → Not sure if any of this is important to the lead.

Hm, what do you mean? Should I move this information to another section?

I don't think it belongs in the article, so it should probably just be removed altogether. Maybe just re-word it to talk about how she signed to a new label. The stuff about other than singles charting and another song of the same name is irrelevant. — Statυs (talk, contribs) 21:33, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done

which would be → which was

Done

This would lead up to Queen signing with the label in April 2010 as the label celebrated its fifth anniversary. → Subsequently, Queen signed a new record deal with the label in April 2010, as they celebrated their fifth anniversary.

Done

The song, composed by Queen, Marcos Masis, Juan Luis Morera Luna and Llandel Veguilla Malavé; the duo known as Wisin & Yandel, features minor key tonality and synthesizers. → Too many breaks. Make into two sentences. One about who composed the song, and another about what the contains.

Done

"Acércate" was pirated before the album was released for the first time in her 15-year career. → "Acércate" was leaked onto the internet prior to the album's release; a first in her 15-year career.

Done

Originally to be included on the album under the name "No Te Equivoques"... → Originally entitled "No Te Equivoques"...

Done

"Sometimes they try to hurt you are when you do well..." → Quote needs an introduction.

Done

Suggest renaming "song information and composition" to music and lyrics.

Done

"Acércate" was included on the album as well as the deluxe edition that was released monthes later. → Unneeded

Done

While failing to chart on main Latin songs charts in Billboard magazine, it did manage to debut and peak at No. 16 on the Latin Rhythm Digital Songs chart the week of July 31, 2010. → Suggest moving to the charts table, not really enough for a stand-alone section.

Done

Adapted from Allmusic → Credits adapted from Allmusic (and unbold)

Done

Allmusic should not be in italics, as it is not a printed source.

Done

Producers are not mentioned in the body.

Done

Thanks for the review! :) — DivaKnockouts (talk) 20:55, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

You're most welcome! — Statυs (talk, contribs) 21:33, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Great work on the article! Passing! — Statυs (talk, contribs) 23:37, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.