Talk:Aage Bohr/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk · contribs) 12:17, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Beginning review. Will add comments over the next several days. Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk) 12:24, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

~~A couple of instances of copyvio need to be addressed in the "Early life" section.~~

"a mansion donated by Carl Jacobsen, the heir to Carlsberg breweries, to be used as an honorary residence by the Dane who had made the most prominent contribution to science, literature or the arts." is slightly rephrased from this source

"Bohr arrived there in October 1943, and then flew to Britain on a de Havilland Mosquito operated by British Overseas Airways Corporation. The Mosquitos were unarmed high-speed bomber aircraft that had been converted to carry small, valuable cargoes or important passengers. By flying at high speed and high altitude, they could cross German-occupied Norway, and yet avoid German fighters. Bohr, equipped with parachute, flying suit and oxygen mask, spent the three-hour flight lying on a mattress in the aircraft's bomb bay" comes from the same source as above

~~After fixing the above issues, you can re-check this article using Earwig's Copyvio Detector~~

~~Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk) 12:58, 9 August 2015 (UTC)~~[reply]

That source acknowledges that it is a copy of the Wikipedia article on Niels Bohr [which I wrote]. I'm just close paraphrasing myself. Hawkeye7 (talk) 21:28, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

OK. Copying from Wikipedia happens a lot. :-) Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk) 21:55, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

A couple of DABs and a dead link that has to be researched...

Which Department of Scientific and Industrial Research?
Done Added disambiguation. Hawkeye7 (talk) 22:46, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
There are a lot of William Braggs, some related, some not.
Done Changed link. Hawkeye7 (talk) 22:46, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
I would imagine that this has been moved: Oral History interview transcript with Aage Bohr 23 & 30 January 1963, American Institute of Physics, Niels Bohr Library and Archives
Done Switched to archived version. Hawkeye7 (talk) 22:46, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

The lede quotes from the Nobel awards page, but I can't figure out Aage Bohr's individual contributions as distinguished from those of Ben Mottelson and James Rainwater from the rather laconic summary. Could you expand the lede just a little so that it can be read apart from the rest of the article? Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk) 22:30, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Done, although I don't think it adds much. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:43, 10 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Hans Bohr, Erik Bohr, and Sortedam Gymnasium are, admittedly, significant enough in Denmark to merit their own wiki pages, but for English-language speakers, I feel that this represents overlinking. Even on the Danish Wikipedia, the corresponding articles are hardly more than stubs. Having famous relatives or being a school that a famous person attended are not usually significant to grant notability. Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk) 23:27, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

N I disagree. High schools are presumed notable, and one with multiple graduates who have English wikipedia articles is likely to attract a translation. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:16, 10 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

It's OK for us to disagree. :-) Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk) 12:22, 10 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Some awkward or unclear phrases:

"That fresh eyes had reached this conclusion put Enrico Fermi's concerns to rest." (awkward phrasing)
Done Re-worded. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:16, 10 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
"...with a thesis concerned with some aspects of atomic stopping problems" (what problems?)
I have no idea. Unless we can find a copy of his unpublished master's thesis, all we have to go on is his statement to that effect. I have linked "atomic stopping problems". Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:16, 10 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

OK. Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk) 12:22, 10 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"By the late 1940s it was known that the properties of atomic nucleus could not be explained..." (Number agreement. "nuclei" versus "nucleus"?)
Done Corrected. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:16, 10 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Stigmatella aurantiaca (talk) 23:42, 9 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]