Talk:A Forest/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: FunkMonk (talk · contribs) 23:43, 24 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Good song! I've reviewed a bunch of album GANs so far, but this is my first song review, so I'll look at some other song GAs first and return here. The Cure reminds me of an ex-girlfriend, so I review this melancholically/nostalgically... FunkMonk (talk) 23:43, 24 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]
The intro should be a summary of the entire article, but doesn't mention anything about recording and composition for example, I think it could be expanded to two paragraphs.

done, though I am a musical neophyte so not clueful on what is most important... Casliber (talk · contribs) 02:22, 2 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

There are two "durings" in the same sentence, could it maybe be rephrased? "during the group's Future Pastimes tour in late 1979, during which "A Forest" was one of the new songs"

one during removed... Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:16, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Why is Smith only introduced as "the Cure's singer" in the second paragraph, but not the first?

rejigged so everyone's role mentioned once... Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:16, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Shouldn't "which made any concerns about radio friendliness irrelevant" be "irrelevant to him"? It surely wasn't irrelevant from an objective POV, if others disagreed.

hmm...interesting, see to my ears the "to him" is implied because the sentence is in Smith's POV. Nevertheless. how is this? Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:16, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

New version looks good, I think it could be misunderstood because it kind of stands on its own, in a pretty long sentence. FunkMonk (talk) 11:28, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Couldn't the last part of this sentence be shortened? "Work on mixing "A Forest" occurred on the final day of sessions for the album, with work on that song taking up much of that period."

shortened. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:25, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The following sentence is long and hard to understand, could be rephrased: "Interviewed in 2004, he did not recall any demo tracks for Seventeen Seconds, with the band generally playing the track in the studio before laying down a backing track to which overdubs were added."

split. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:42, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The tense is inconsistent in this sentence "Cure biographer Jeff Apter referred to "A Forest" as "the definitive early Cure mood piece" and he argues the song is the centrepiece of the album."

'present' ed. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:39, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Which is it here? "He has stated that it became was a pivotal recording for the group"

shortened. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:32, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Why is the following notable? Many guitar solos lack bends. "a guitar solo appears which avoids string bends" Maybe unusual during the period?

no idea. I guess it is in because the source mentions it....I keep thinking of songs with bends like "Comfortably Numb" and "Rocket Man"..... Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:41, 5 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I think it needs to be specified where each version is found: "The shorter version of the song fades out, while on the longer version the instruments exit one by one, concluding with the sound of the bass guitar." If one is the single edit, for example, this should be mentioned.

clarified Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:50, 3 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Why use two terms for the same thing? "The promotional video for "A Forest" was the band's first. The music video was created by" Last time you could just say "it was".

'pronoun' ed. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:39, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The external videos seem to be arbitrarily chosen, and the second one is dead. Why not the official video, if anything?

removed Casliber (talk · contribs) 01:05, 2 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The following sentence is a bit clunky: "The single of the "Tree mix" of "A Forest" was released on 6 December 1990" What about "The "Tree Mix" edit/version of "A Forest" was released as a single on..."

done. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:42, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The following sentence is quite hard to understand. "Ror-Shak, released in 2005, on their only album Deep, covered the song." What does it mean?

hmm, not sure what happened there - rejigged now Casliber (talk · contribs) 22:12, 27 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

How about a sound sample?

I have no experience with sound files as yet. Might have to ask someone.... Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:41, 5 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

What is the format of note 6? It has no source, and there are no other such footnotes.

source added. Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:41, 5 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The following sentences have no source: "An acoustic version was recorded and released on the bonus disc that came with some copies of the 2001 Greatest Hits CD. Robert Smith supplied vocals for a Blank & Jones cover version in 2003."

sourced the latter...the former is proving annoyingly elusive to find (even though obvious...) Casliber (talk · contribs) 01:50, 2 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

That's it from me. And by the way, the mention of Bat For Lashes reminds me of another ex-girlfriend, who looked like her (minus the snub nose), bawww! I need to listen to some Cure now... FunkMonk (talk) 00:25, 25 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Alright, I think it looks god now. The sound sample is of course only optional, but could be nice to have, and will not impact whether this passes or not. So I will pass it now. FunkMonk (talk) 13:36, 5 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail: