Talk:2013 Wichita bombing attempt
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[edit]This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Bradybuss. Peer reviewers: Awbritt.
Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 16:34, 17 January 2022 (UTC)
Comment moved from article
[edit]On May 4, 2017, User:Madeline.mcclaran added the following comment to the end of the article.
- It would greatly improve the beginning of your article if you added in a 'lead section' at the beginning of the article as an overall and brief explanation in order to lead into what you are going to talk about. The structure of your first paragraph needs work and could flow much more fluidly if you could add in some details rather than being choppy and direct. Try not to get too repetitive mentioning points already addressed in your initial paragraph later on in the article. I think that if you added sections and subsections to your article it would help with your organization of the article to improve the fluidity. I am not sure that it is relevant enough to mention the recent name change of the airport. Think about expanding more on Loewen's involvement with the FBI. I think it would help to add some additional information to your third paragraph to link your main points together. Maybe add some more comments regarding the FBI's response and thoughts on Loewen. I feel like you have quite a few sources, but not much direct information so I am not sure how they were all used in the writing process of this article. I would sequence your article in chronological order in the time period each specific event occurred to keep those who read it from having to go back and forth while reading. Be sure to proof read your article, especially for proper sentence structure and relevance to the topic of discussion.
I have removed it from the article and placed it here instead. —Granger (talk · contribs) 22:51, 4 May 2017 (UTC)
The Timeline needs to be redone. AmericanAir88 (talk) 14:29, 28 July 2017 (UTC)
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