Talk:1999–2000 Arsenal F.C. season

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:1999–2000 Arsenal F.C. season/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Cloudz679 (talk · contribs) 21:46, 13 January 2014 (UTC) I will review this article. C679 21:46, 13 January 2014 (UTC)

• External refs are working aside from [1], which will need to be fixed.

• In-line citations should be provided throughout the article, on occasion it is unclear exactly how many preceding sentences are covered by the ref, especially when it is offline.

• The article could do with a copy edit for jargon and grammar; I have listed the most obvious issues below which will need to be fixed.

most obvious issues

• "Arsenal exited both domestic cup competitions on penalties, being eliminated by Leicester City in a FA Cup fourth round replay and by Middlesbrough at the same stage." (of the League Cup?)
• "For the second consecutive season Arsenal failed to progress past the group stages of the UEFA Champions League;" the group stage
• "A number of signings were made by Arsenal in the transfer window," summer or winter?
• "after spitting on West Ham United player Neil Ruddock" "at" or "on"? In the main body it is "at". Be careful because the source text is "allegedly spitting in the face". This is definitely a BLP issue.
• "After a goalless draw, the game was decided on penalties which Arsenal lost." awkward wording, they didn't lose the penalties
• "Inconsistent performances in the league, particularly away from home meant Arsenal never posed a serious threat to Manchester United, the reigning champions." comma after "home"
• "The player felt it was the "right decision" as he wanted first-team football and thanked manager Arsène Wenger: "[He] extended my career by at least two years. He is so professional and thorough in everything he does."[6]" awkward wording
• "Striker Nicolas Anelka in the summer stated his desire to leave Arsenal and cited the English media as a reason for wanting to leave the club as they "...cause me enormous problems on a personal level."" awkward wording, also the quote must be followed by an inline citation
• what is a "bit-part midfielder"?
• "The game took place at Wembley Stadium on 1 August 1999." drop the year, it is given in the previous sentence
• "Three days after, Emmanuel Petit and Bergkamp scored" Three days later
• "United midfielder Roy Keane scored twice to overturn Arsenal’s 41st minute lead and end the home team’s long unbeaten record at home.[35]" how long was it?
• "What made matters worse was Patrick Vieira’s dismissal for a foul on Di Canio." Sounds like POV, try to make it more neutral
• "which put the team in good stead before their Champions League match against Barcelona." use plain English
• "which left Arsenal fourth, a point behind Sunderland in third and three behind league leaders Leeds United.[47][48]" reword prose
• "followed by Tim Sherwood 13 minutes afterwards" clarify this
• "Vieira pulled a goal back for Arsenal from a header" jargon?
• "to reduce Arsenal down to nine men." without "down"
• "The defender played no part in the Christmas period." I don't like this because it sounds awkward and the reference is from 6 December and cannot logically support the text
• "Leeds United, who was eight points in front of Arsenal" were
• "after the Leeds’ match" Leeds match, compound noun
• "opponent’s inexperience" opponents', plural
• "They were unable to take advantage of Manchester United’s absence at the FIFA Club World Championship in Brazil, being held to a 1–1 draw.[59]" what does this entail?
• "The first of which was against Arsenal at Old Trafford on 24 January 2000." The first was…
• "Wenger chose to pack his midfield" rephrase
• "looked more “fresher”" more fresh / fresher
• "The team, without Adams, Keown and Overmars lost to Middlesbrough a week later." comma after Overmars
• "Arsenal played out a 3–3 draw was against Sheffield Wednesday" draw against
• "Henry scored in his seven consecutive match for the team, equaling the league record." seventh… the league record needs a ref
• "scuffles took place between British and Turkish supporters at the City Hall Square" at City Hall Square
• "Arsenal was unable to take advantage of Galatasaray's numerical disadvantage" Arsenal were, consistency

That's as far as I've got for now. C679 22:46, 13 January 2014 (UTC)

Thanks for the thorough review; I believe I have addressed all your comments. I'll have another look at it sometime tomorrow or the next day and check the grammar again. Lemonade51 (talk) 23:54, 13 January 2014 (UTC)

Second look

Just one of the above needs further work:

• Striker Steffen Iversen and mifielder Tim Sherwood each scored for Tottenham after 20 minutes.

I have done some minor copy-editing myself. Otherwise I am listing a number of outstanding issues, which should be addressed before passing the article. Because it is close to passing, I am not putting the article's nomination on hold. See below:

• "Sylvinho made his debut for Arsenal, while Luzhny was named on the substitutes' bench." context? Why is Luzhny singled out?

New signings. Have removed that sentence as it's covered in the main article.

• "end the home team’s long unbeaten run at home since December 1997." rephrase

• "Lee Dixon, Nigel Winterburn and Overmars were rested for the match, replaced by Luzhny, Slyvinho and Šuker." needs a ref

• "The player then spat at Neil Ruddock, who barged into him and Vieira was dragged off the pitch by officials." BLP issue. It is now ok in the lead but I am unsure if the text is sufficiently neutral in the body of the article.
  • Reworded
• "which moved their opponents ahead of them in third" reword

• "Arsenal beat their rivals Tottenham a week later, which kick-started a run of eight consecutive league wins.[72]" This reference only appears to support the beating of Tottenham and not the 8 consecutive wins
  • Removed the 8 consecutive wins bit.
• "Gabriel Batistuta scored the only goal in a match Arsenal dominated much of." reword

• "Wenger said he intended to take the competition "very seriously" given the team's lack of European experience. Arsenal played their home games at Highbury instead of Wembley." needs refs
  • Cited now
• "after an Arsenal fan was stabbed." needs a ref, not mentioned in ref 106
  • Added
• "The match itself was a lacklustre affair, as neither side scored after 120 minutes of action and Arsenal were unable to take advantage of Galatasaray's numerical disadvantage; Gheorghe Hagi was sent off in the 94th minute." reword

• Why aren't John Lukic or Stuart Taylor (footballer born 1980) in the stats? They appear in the squad list at ref 109
  • Neither Lukic or Taylor appeared in any of the four main competitions for Arsenal that season.
• Where does the discipline section of the stats come from? ref 1 only seems to include appearances and goals.
  • Cited
• Average attendance does not seem to be mentioned at the link, find a better reference.
  • The source lists all of Arsenal's matches that season; the average attendance calculation was done by hand.

C679 09:35, 14 January 2014 (UTC)

Believe I have addressed these comments now; thanks once more. Lemonade51 (talk) 18:25, 14 January 2014 (UTC)

Thank you for your swift actions and well done on a very good article. It now meets the criteria. C679 18:35, 14 January 2014 (UTC)