Talk:1933 Chesapeake–Potomac hurricane/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: TheAustinMan (talk · contribs) 22:36, 29 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Hello Hurricanehink. I will be reviewing 1933 Chesapeake–Potomac hurricane using a top-to-bottom format that hints at all issues within the article. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 22:36, 29 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Review Bot Checks

Dablinks – No disambiguations
Checklinks – No dead or questionable links
Automatic peer reviewer – No errors. Good work!

Lead

You ought to try a more interesting opening sentence. The current one is a boring boilerplate, and should, again, be changed to something more interesting. This was a high impacting tropical cyclone that struck the East Coast of the United States, after all.
- Agreed, changed. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"Advanced warning allowed hundreds of people to evacuate ahead of the hurricane making landfall in northeastern North Carolina on August 23 with winds of about 90 mph (150 km/h)." – Try splitting this sentence up. You introduce a tidbit about the scale of hurricane evacuation and then plop in information about landfall location and intensity.
- Split. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"Similarly heavy damage occurred in Maryland, mostly from crop damage." – 'Heavy damage', mostly from 'crop damage'. A bit redundant, since damage is, well, damage. It would've worked if you had a damage totaled followed by 'mostly from crop damage' but in this case you don't. Try mixing it up so you don't have to indicate that crop damage accounted for a lot of damage, which sounds strange.
- Added total for crops. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"In Canada, heavy rainfall assisted firefighters,..." – Clarify. I know it sounds almost like common sense, but how did the rains help the firefighters? Were they suddenly thirsty, so the rains helped satisfy their thirst? Certainly not, but, alas, please clarify. It would be helpful if you included where in particular as well. Canada is pretty big. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 22:36, 29 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
- Ugh, I explained :P --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Meteorological history

Just a general note. For such a long lasting hurricane, the meteorological history seems pretty short. Are you sure that was it?
- It was 1933, and the storm did have a pretty boring path. Originally the Weather Bureau didn't begin advisories til it was a C4. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"While the hurricane continued to the northwest, the eye briefly moved overNorfolk, Virginia, for the first time since the 1821 Norfolk and Long Island hurricane." – You should try to clarify this. The sentence indicates that the eye of this particular hurricane crossed Norfolk for the first time since 100+ years ago. You should do some sentence shaping to indicate that it was the first time that the eye of a hurricane passed directly over Norfolk.
- Not exactly, but I tweaked it. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Link Maine. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 22:36, 29 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
- Why? --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Preparations and impact

"In Norfolk, Virginia, most ships either remained at port due to advanced warning." – Either remained at port or...?
- Fixed, added the "either". --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Link Cape Hatteras.
- Done. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"Along the coast, the United States Coast Guard rescued more than 200 people, many of whom due to capsized boats." – Correct me if I'm wrong, but 'many of whom due to' sounds very strange. Perhaps a rewording may be required.
- IDK, I could just remove "of whom". Would that work? --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"The Potomac in Alexandria was at the highest level since 1899,..." → 'the highest' to 'its highest'
- Mokay. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Link Old Town to Old Town Alexandria.
- Didn't know it existed, thanks! --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"Rainfall in Atlantic City totaled 8.12 in (206 mm), including 2.25 in (57 mm) that fell in an hour on August 20, which was the monthly average." – You should say something along the lines of the rainfall from (these days) was equivalent to the average totals for the entire month, instead of saying the rainfall is the average, which is somewhat odd.
- I'm not sure what you're saying. 2.25 inches was the average monthly rainfall, according to the source I had. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"The storm spawned a tornado in Wildwood." → Was there any damage?
- The source says "causing additional damage", but no specifics. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"Heavy rainfall in the state increased levels along streams, causing one person to drown at Mount Tremper." → Should specify water levels, and not just any levels. Walter Creek leveled up! TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 22:36, 29 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
- Agreed, heh. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Other sections

Nope. Good work! TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 22:36, 29 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
- Thanks! Replied all around. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 01:24, 30 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]