Talk:1899 Atlantic hurricane season/GA1
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Reviewer: Hurricanehink (talk · contribs) 05:11, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "There were nine tropical storms, of which five became hurricanes, while two of those strengthened into major hurricanes, which are Category 3 or higher on the modern day Saffir–Simpson hurricane wind scale." - split, too long :P
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "The first system, Tropical Storm One" - don't really need to call it that. It wasn't called that operationally, and it isn't called that in literature. Ditto the last storm.
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "September 3 - September 4" - either make this a dash, or say "September 3 through the following day"
- Used the latter option--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "nicknamed the 1899 San Ciriaco hurricane" - we already got that it's 1899. Don't think that the year is needed here (ditto the Carabelle hurricane).
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "A post-season analysis of this storm indicated that it was the longest-lasting Atlantic tropical cyclone on record. " - that's false, since it was the longest
- How is this wrong? It doesn't say "was one of the longest-lasting Atlantic tropical cyclones on record."--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 14:54, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "Impact was reported along much of its path, including in the Lesser Antilles, Puerto Rico, Dominican Republic, the Bahamas, Florida, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, and the Azores.' - why don't you just say "The path impacted the Lesser......."
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- " contributed to an ongoing flood event in Texas." - think you can change this to "in the state", since it's established it's Texas.
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "12,000 square miles (31,000 km2) of land was " - was--> were
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "At Hearne, the flood's highest recorded stage, water rose above every rain gauge." - not sure what this means
- I'll just ditch that part about the "flood's highest recorded state".--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "The next storm, known as Hurricane San Ciriaco" - why would you link it again?
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "Shortly after moving inland, it weakened to a Category 2 hurricane at 0600 UTC on August 18, six hours before falling to Category 1 intensity" - do you need both SSHS intensities here?
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "Between August 26 and September 1, the storm did not differentiate in intensity. Though by September 2, it began re-strengthening while turning southeastward." - merge sentences
- Better?--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- Watch for your wording in the 2nd paragraph of the San Ciriaco hurricane. This backs up it being the longest-lasting, at 27.75 days (more than Ginger).
- So which one is right?--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "which estates suffered considerable damage." - not sure what you were going for
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "which estates suffered considerable damage. Nearly all estates were destroyed on Saint Croix. " - this seems redundant
- Better?--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "strong winds and waves sank 50 small crafts, most of them were at Andros" - get rid of the "were"
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "Because the "entire island" was inundated " - what island?
- Link HURDAT?
- Are you talking about in Hurricane Five? Sorry, HURDAT was already linked in the lede.--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "20°N, 84.1°W" - this isn't useful
- Removed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- "In the city of Black River" - since this opens a paragraph, you should clarify the country. Ditto with "Wrightsville Beach" and state
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- " Yallahs, Saint Thomas Parish, Jamaica" - bit too much specification here
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- " It continued weaken" - grammar
- Fixed--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- The structure for "Tropical Storm Ten" is odd. You have one paragraph for MH, and then the next one is a mix.
- Paragraphs are a bit asymmetrical, but I think it should be better now.--12george1 (talk) 05:43, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
- Overall pretty decent! Lemne know if there are any questions. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 05:11, 2 September 2013 (UTC)
Looks good now, passing. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 21:19, 2 September 2013 (UTC)