Draft talk:The Zhao Fuqiang Case

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Crime and Criminal Biography: Organized crime

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Article problems

@Hzt0208042508415531 tw Hello! From the sources I can see it seems to be notable (though it is difficult to evaluate so I am not sure. The issues I have identified are as follows:

The problems are is that the grammar and structure is difficult to understand. Reading this article, it is difficult to follow the sequence of events. The lead does not properly introduce the topic and why it is notable, instead giving background information, leading to a confusing start. The lead should summarize the content in the body, not contain new information - maybe add a background section and put that content there? The lead should also say why it is notable.

Reading this article left me confused about what the topic was and its significance. I'm just not really sure about what this is - what about this case did the press covering it identify as significant? From what is here, it just reads as "some people got investigated" and that's it. It also needs some grammar copy editing as parts were hard to understand.

Also, if this was a translation from a Chinese article, you must link to the version it is translated from and say that it is a translation in an edit summary, for attribution reasons. PARAKANYAA (talk) 14:41, 2 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

OK, I got what needs to copyedit and I will try to do it. If there is anything else I have not correct, could you assist me with that? Hzt0208042508415531 tw (talk) 16:12, 21 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

> though it is difficult to evaluate so I am not sure

You can use the tools to translate the original source into English to check it out; it is shocking news in mainland China. Hzt0208042508415531 tw (talk) 16:15, 21 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]