Talk:John William Pitt Kinau/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: QatarStarsLeague (talk · contribs) 15:33, 1 July 2013 (UTC) This seems like an interesting article. QatarStarsLeague (talk) 15:33, 1 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox & lead

We have an issue with the portrait. Please add the US public domain tag if possible. If not possible, please remove the image.

Done--KAVEBEAR (talk) 03:41, 2 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Early life and family

"He was grandson Prime Minister Kalanimoku..." Please input to or of into this sentence.
"...also known as The Iron Cable of Hawaii." This needs to be referenced. Also, why did he received this sobriquet?

Because of his abilities in what field? QatarStarsLeague (talk) 03:43, 2 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Just his abilities as a chief, his position as governor, his experience in war, the whole caboodle. It was a term of reverance and admiration. A lot of 19th century and 20th centuries sources call him this, and according to Barbara Del Piano it started out after a old woman called him that after his return from Kauai where he suppressed the Humehume rebellion. Going into specific details seem unneeded on his grandson's article.

Is "political savvy and military prowess" better?--KAVEBEAR (talk) 07:40, 2 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Fair enough. Its just that noting a nickname was bequeathed for "abilities" seems strange. QatarStarsLeague (talk) 16:07, 2 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Kuakini swa me..." Please correct spelling mistake.

Done--KAVEBEAR (talk) 06:34, 2 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Education and Career

First of all, please use a lowercase c in the section's title.
"...American missionaries Amos Starr Cooke and his wife, Juliette Montague Cooke with his royal cousins." Maybe alter to read: "American missionaries Amos Starr Cooke and his wife, Juliette Montague Cooke, alongside his royal cousins....'
Please wikilink Honolulu Fort.

Done--KAVEBEAR (talk) 03:41, 2 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Death and burial

Please place a comma after November 6.
Comma after Tomb.

Done--KAVEBEAR (talk) 03:41, 2 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Conclusion

Once these present issues are allayed, I will perform a postliminary review on the article, and then pass the article. Congratulations! QatarStarsLeague (talk) 02:52, 2 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Hi QatarStarsLeague can you archive this? Thanks,--KAVEBEAR (talk) 18:14, 29 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]