Talk:TT1/GA1

GA Review

Passed. Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 10:34, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Nominator: Merytat3n (talk · contribs) 02:00, 25 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewer: Rollinginhisgrave (talk · contribs) 13:35, 30 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

I'll take this one on. Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 13:35, 30 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

General Comments

I'll be adding comments as I go. Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 17:18, 30 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

I saw your authorship stat and went back to look at the article before you started contributing. You should be really proud. Very few prose issues, just one sourcing clarification needed with sourcing. I'm looking forward to approving this. Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 18:28, 30 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Looking great Merytat3n. Another one for GA. Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 10:31, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Prose and Content

"Sennedjem had a probable elder brother named Tjaro" can this awkward sentence be reworded?

Reworded to "Sennedjem had three brothers: Tutuya (or Tutuia), Messu (or Mose), and an elder brother, Tjaro."Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

"Above this is a small section of a band of text giving Khonsu's name and title" could you clarify what this small section was?

A small (preserved) section of hieroglyphic text. I have moved it down to the bottom of the section, as it is what divides the wall decoration from the ceiling decoration. Hopefully clarified as "A band of hieroglyphic text, preserved only in small sections, gave Khonsu's name and title, and served to divide the wall decoration from the ceiling all around the chapel."Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

The tomb descended further via a concealed shaft leading to a painted doorway closed with a decorated door sealed with a moulded clay seal in the shape of the head of the god Anubis run on sentence

Fixed!Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

It led to a series of underground rooms, including the extensively decorated burial chamber is past tense used for a reason?

Not particularly, fixed.Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

further chamber 3.50 metres (11.5 ft) square units?

I was trying to mean it was square, 3.50 m long and wide. Changed to make it clearer.Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Glosses: barque, lintel, sem-priest, leonine-bier, imiut fetishes, solar bull, ostraca.

Glossed or reworded. Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

I would suggest subheadings in the decorations section as there is a lot of text describing.

Done! Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Little is known about the exact positions of the objects and burials as no plan was made and few photographs were taken. and The exact positions of the objects within the burial chamber at the time of discovery is unknown as no plan was made and few photographs were taken dupe

Un-duped hopefully. Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

A scarab pectoral is also known for him. This might not be ungrammatical, but just my lack of knowledge of Egypt; does this make sense?

There is a scarab pectoral that is inscribed with Khonsu's name. Presumably it was placed on his mummy but it is not recorded that it was; only the unwrapping of his body is well documented. Made it easier to read as "He was also provided with a scarab pectoral." Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

She wears a long wig with a floral fillet and topped with lotus flowers can "and" be removed here?

Sure. Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Once in Cairo, a sample of representative or unique items were kept for the museum while the rest was sold at the direction of Maspero to provide funds for further excavation work elsewhere in Egypt and The museum lacked the space to properly house the collection; key pieces were placed on display while the rest was kept in storerooms or in outside areas. Maspero offered some of the artefacts for sale to fund further excavation work in Egypt. dupe text

De-duped I hope. In this aspect, I hope a little dupe is okay : ) Merytat3n (talk) 10:25, 31 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Spot check

1) The next two scenes show Sennedjem adoring gods of truth, gods of the earth, and concluding with Sennedjem before a triad headed by Thoth.: Spelling of trial; can you find a quote supporting the gods of truth and gods of the earth claims?

Triad is correct, meaning a group of three, so I have changed it to "group of three gods".

Hmm. I can't find anything direct in Sousa (2019) so that's a mistake on my part. Bruyère (1959) mentions the gods in the second scene are called "gods of truth" in the hieroglyphic caption (p.28). He says the caption of the third scene calls the deities "gods of the Duat" (p.29). In a bit of original research for a moment, I have minimal hieroglyphic literacy so I can confirm they are called that in the hieros. Sousa (2019) p.106 identifies the vignettes as "underworld deities", and "a cosmological scene featuring a snake, perhaps Sa Ta (meaning the “Son of the Earth”) twisted over the horizon, and a mummiform god seated under the sky". Farid and Farid (2001) p.4 (presented in the source in opposite order) refer to them as "Gods of Truth" and "gods of the Duat (the Underworld". Porter and Moss (1960) p.4 describes it as "2, deceased adores three demons, 3, deceased adores Gods of Underworld and serpent on horizon, 4, deceased adores Thoth and two demons".

I have changed it to "The next two scenes show Sennedjem adoring two groups of underworld gods, identified in their respective captions as gods of truth, and gods of the Duat (Underworld)." citing Farid and Farid.

2) His set of two nested mummiform coffins were found on Sennedjem's funerary bed.

3) excavations by the Egyptologist Bernard Bruyère found no trace of them

4) She may have been a second wife of Khabekhnet or Khabekhnet's own mother

5) Menéndez suggests the artist responsible is Pashed, the chief draughtsman active during the reigns of Seti I and Ramesses II who worked on the tomb of Seti I in the Valley of the Kings and in tombs in the Valley of the Queens.

Other

Images: Tagged with copyright, no issues with being free
No OR, COPYVIO
Broad, neutral, stable

Rollinginhisgrave (talk) 17:18, 30 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.