Talk:Jon Cryer/GA3

GA Review

Good article nomination on hold

This article's Good Article promotion has been put on hold. During review, some issues were discovered that can be resolved without a major re-write. This is how the article, as of September 8, 2008, compares against the six good article criteria:

1. Well written?: I see that this article has had some good work [1] put into it since the last 2 failed GA Reviews. I would still like to see a bit more copyediting. Big paragraph in Career subsection could be broken apart, could use a bit better flow.

2. Factually accurate?: Is the first paragraph in the Career section sourced to the first cite that appears later in the paragraph? This should be made more clear if so.

3. Broad in coverage?: Background title should be changed to Early life or something like that, it should also be expanded if possible. The last sentence in that section appears to be unsourced.

4. Neutral point of view?: Appears to be matter-of-fact style, no real issues here.

5. Article stability? The talk page seems friendly enough, but there is some conflict apparent in the edit history. Has this issue been resolved or is this still a conflict?

6. Images?: One free-use image from Wikimedia Commons, one fair-use image with fair use rationale provided on the image page. However the edit history of Image:JonCryerPrettyinPink.jpg and the tags present on that image show a disagreement over its fair use status. This needs to be resolved before this article can move to GA status.

Please address these matters soon and then leave a note here showing how they have been resolved. After 48 hours the article should be reviewed again. If these issues are not addressed within 7 days, the article may be failed without further notice. Thank you for your work so far. Cirt (talk) 01:25, 8 September 2008 (UTC)

Comment

Sorry for my late comment, but I was away last week. Second of all, thank you for putting my article on hold, and not just delete it, like previous reviewers did. Anyhow, I've expanded the article,

1. Well written?: Well I tried to break it up some more, but it's not really noticable.

2. Factually accurate?: No, but I found another source.

3. Broad in coverage?: Renamed the background section to early life and sourced the final sentence. I tried to expand but it's really hard to find reliable sources.

4. Neutral point of view?: -

5. Article stability? The article had some minor issues, but since the image has been deleted it seems stable.

6. Images?: The fair-use rationale image has been deleted and has been replaced with a free image.

Alright, if you got any more comments for me I'll be glad to hear them. --Music26/11 17:46, 13 September 2008 (UTC)

My apologies, multiple wiki-stuff going on at the moment, please understand if it might take me a bit to reevaluate. Cheers and nice work, Cirt (talk) 18:33, 13 September 2008 (UTC)

Reevaluation

The article still has some remaining issues to address with regard to points (1) and (2), all other outstanding issues appear to be resolved.

1. This article still needs some copyediting from a third-party individual or individuals that have not previously read the article or had a hand in it as significant contributors. Sentences like In an interview with Daily News, Cryer's mother said that after Pretty in Pink, she started getting calls from teenage girls from all over the world, who would leave hysterical, giggling messages on her answering machine. (a bit long and run-on) and Thanks to Pretty in Pink Cryer slowly became more famous, in 1987 he even got to portray Superman villain Lenny Luthor in Superman IV: The Quest for Peace. ("he even got to...") -- there is a lot of usage of "got..." in this article that needs copyediting. It is not that far off, but it does need a bit of work. Cirt (talk) 21:56, 13 September 2008 (UTC)
2. There are still a bunch of unsourced sentences throughout the article that need to be addressed:

   • At age nineteen Cryer first appeared in the 1984 romantic comedy film No Small Affair, having the lead role as Charles Cummings.
   • Thanks to Pretty in Pink Cryer slowly became more famous, in 1987 he even got to portray Superman villain Lenny Luthor in Superman IV: The Quest for Peace.
   • One year later, he got to star with Charlie Sheen in the Jim Abrahams comedy Hot Shots, which was received very positively.
   • In 2000, Cryer, again, got the lead in a comedy series, called The Trouble with Normal, for the third time, the show got canceled after it's first season.

Thanks for your efforts so far and I will leave it on hold so that there is a chance to address some of the above. You may wish to seek out someone from Wikipedia:WikiProject Guild of Copy Editors for some help with copyediting the writing/grammar in this article. Cirt (talk) 21:56, 13 September 2008 (UTC)

Comment

I did what you asked, please comment. --Music26/11 10:49, 14 September 2008 (UTC)

Okay, will take another look soon. Cirt (talk) 04:23, 16 September 2008 (UTC)

Not GA at this time

I'm sorry but the article still has some significant issues with prose, grammar, and flow. The first sentence of the 2nd paragraph in the lede is way, way too long and run-on. There are issues with many other sentences in this article - there are still way too many "got..." instances that are quite awkward (I count 6). Did you get a third-party editor to read this over that has never read this article before? It really badly needs copyediting from someone that has not read or been a contributor to this article, a fresh pair of eyes, or better yet more than one. I'll wait a few more days but like I said, the prose/grammar/readability needs a lot of work, I'm afraid. Cirt (talk) 04:30, 17 September 2008 (UTC)

Not GA at this time - I would suggest a peer review before trying again for WP:GAN, as this article has been through several GA reviews already. Cirt (talk) 22:45, 24 September 2008 (UTC)

The article has been listed to be reviewed by a copy editor, when he/she is finished I'll try a peer review. Thanks for your review. --Music26/11 14:43, 26 September 2008 (UTC)