Talk:Jauchzet, frohlocket! Auf, preiset die Tage, BWV 248 I/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 16:30, 26 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

Infobox (and scattered throughout the prose), "Luke 2:13–7" is that 13–17? And secondly, that seems to link to Luke chapter 2 verse 1 not verse 13, while something like "Isaiah 9:2–7" links to Isaiah chapter 9 verse 2 directly. All such links should be checked that they link directly to the appropriate verse in Wikisource.
Good catch! missing a comma, which makes a big difference ;) --GA
Image caption: "Autograph of the beginning" I don't understand this. An autograph is just someone's signature. Can you explain what this means?
I did it again. What Germans call Autograph is in English manuscript, what's in English autograph is in German Autogramm. The pic is called "BWV 248 Autograph.jpg". --GA
"Manuscript of the beginning" the beginning of what? Do you mean manuscript of the opening movements or something? The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 20:59, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
made it "First page". Bach saved paper. It's the beginning of the first movement on top, and below the beginning of the second movement, recitative. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 21:14, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
"Ring out, ye trumpets!" the literal translation would just be "Ring out, trumpets!" (no ye) and in fact would the "resound ye drums" be more like "resound your drums"?
You are right about the "no ye". Translations vary, and perhaps we should take one or two sourced ones. Sound, all ye drums now! Resound, all ye trumpets! by University of Vermont is a singable translation (matching syllables), Sound, ye drums! Ring out, Trumpets by AllMusic is literal, but why "Trumpets" capital? Sadly can't see the page in the Dürr/Jones book, and Pamela Dellal has Sound, you drums! Ring forth, trumpets!. --GA

Yeah, it was just a thought, of course all such translations are open to a little artistic licence in this kind of context. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 20:55, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
"the 11th birthday of the crown-prince" which crown-prince? You mentioned Maria by name in the previous sentence.
her son, and also mentioned by name --Gerda Arendt (talk) 20:42, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I'm talking about in the lead, where Maria is mentioned by name but the mysterious "crown-prince" is not named... The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 20:55, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
In an article about the Christmas oratorio, I thought it was a bit too much detail. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 21:17, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
To me it's consistent detail to include the name. Also when you say "the crown prince", it's kind of assumptive, i.e. that the reader will know who "the" crown prince you're talking about is. You can just pipe link it if necessary, but as it stands I don't think it makes for good etiquette for our non-expert readers (e.g. me). The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 08:02, 29 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I added his name, shortened the date in the lead. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 08:08, 29 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
" Thomaskantor in Leipzig, director of music in major churches in the town in the Electorate of Saxony." hard to parse, I would prefer " Thomaskantor, director of music in major churches, in Leipzig in the Electorate of Saxony."
How about the comma after Leipzig, because "churches in Leipzig" should be together. Enough people think that he only worked for the Thomaskirche. --GA
" Epistle of Titus," was actually the epistle to Titus.
another good catch --GA
"the Nativity, Annunciation" neither need capitalisation.
if you say so --GA
"had collaborated with Bach before" ->"had previously collaborated with Bach"
taken --GA
"the Christmas story is " not the appropriate link.
oops --GA
"the Nativity of Jesus until " already linked in the previous paragraph, and no need for the capital N.
done --GA
You hyphenated "crown-prince" in the lead but not in the prose.
removed hyphen --GA
"written for 11th birthday" missing "the".
fixed --GA
" hymn * "Gelobet seist du, Jesu Christ".[8]" why the asterisk?
(probably copied from somewhere and forgotten) --GA
" repeated in a v" odd construction, needs an "and" and "it" or similar (e.g. "and repeated it in a")
taken --GA
"long da capo form (ABA)." What does ABA bring here? You don't explain it or use it subsequently.
if you say so, - I thought that even someone too lazy to look up what "da capo" means could see at a glance that section A is repeated after section B --GA
I just had literally no clue what ABA means, in this format it looks like it is supposed to be some kind of abbreviation. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 20:55, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
After looking at the (rather poor) da capo article, I switched to ternary form which explains A-B-A. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 21:24, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
What's a "secco recitative"? Needs linking.
well, a link to secco recitative goes to much history within recitative, while the explanation of secco (dry, only continuo) is right at the top (which was linked before) --GA
" recitative Und sie gebar ihren ersten Sohn" shouldn't that German phrase be in quotations like all the others?
"begins Wer will die Liebe recht erhöhn " ditto.
yes, both (sloppiness) --GA
Bach Digital" in italics or not? Be consistent.
fixed --GA
"Dellal, Pamela (2018). "BWV 248-I - Jauchzet, frohlocket, auf, preiset die Tage". Emmanuel Music. Retrieved 6 December 2018." replace spaced hyphen with spaced en-dash.
"Dellal, Pamela" no need to relink name.
both fixed --GA
"Villa Musica." our article italicises this term.
no more ;) --GA

That's all I have on a first pass, so I'll place on hold while these are considered. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 19:20, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for many good catches, most taken, your turn again. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 20:42, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Couple of responses. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 20:55, 28 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]

replied --Gerda Arendt (talk) 07:51, 29 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good to me, so I'm happy to pass this. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 09:29, 29 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Jauchzet - rejoice ;) --Gerda Arendt (talk) 09:30, 29 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]