Talk:Hikari (Hikaru Utada song)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Carbrera (talk · contribs) 03:22, 2 June 2016 (UTC)

Infobox

• All good!

Lead

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• I recently found out that lyrics "discussing" anything is grammatically incorrect because lyrics are not "animate objects" so they cannot discuss. You're going to have to change this

Paragraph 2

• Link "music critics" here to the article for "Music journalism" please
• "song writing" --> "songwriting"
• "her husband at the time Kazuaki Kiriya;" --> "her then-husband, Kazuaki Kiria;"

Paragraph 3

• Remove the "the" before "international theme songs." please
• "It was released as an A-side 12-inch single with Utada's single "Colors" in 2003, and received positive reviews from most music critics." --> "It was later released as an A-side 12-inch single with Utada's single "Colors" in 2003."

Background and release

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• "Nomura furthered stated;" --> "Nomura further stated"

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• "The song included live instrumentation by Kawano Kei (keyboards and programming), Tsunemi Kazuhide (synthesizers), and Akiyama Hironori (acoustic guitar), whilst it was arranged by Utada and Kawano Kei." --> "The song's instrumentation consists of keyboards and programming handled by Kawano Kei, synthesizers from Tsunemi Kazuhide, and an acoustic guitar from Akiyama Hironori."
• In the lead, it also states it was released in 2003 alongside single "Colors"; add this if it applies here please

Paragraph 3

• Nothing, but consider the 2003 release you discussed in the lead please

Composition

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• "described the songs composition" --> "described the song's composition"
• "extended review;" --> "extended review:"

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• "According to Kano, the editor in chief of Rockin'On Japan, he stated that the lyrical content discusses themes of mystery and daily life actions. He furthered believed that the song's lyrics is an open interpretation, due to its lack of major characteristics; he identified philosophy and religion as examples.[14]" --> "According to Kano, the editor in chief of Rockin'On Japan, he stated that the lyrical content discusses themes of mystery and daily life actions; he furthered believed that the song's lyrics is an open interpretation, due to its lack of major characteristics and identified philosophy and religion as examples.[14]"
• Add the release year of Ultra Blue in parentheses after mentioning it (in this case, 2006)
• Citation needed for the final sentence here

Critical response

• Link "music critics" here to the article for "Music journalism" please (Since it's the first mention in the article minus the lead.)
• Remove the spaces before and after the n-dash in Neo Locke's review please; it's only there for stylistic reasons
• "for the songs "nostalgia" vibe.[11]" --> "for the song's nostalgic vibe.[11]" (I changed the wording so it is grammatically correct.)
• "labelled" --> "labeled"
• "Equally in another similar yet positive review, Shinko Music's Hiroshi Shinito praised the songwriting and the chorus.[13]" --> "In a similar review, Shinko Music's Hiroshi Shinito praised the songwriting and the chorus.[13]"
• "Although describing the song in a positive manner, Sharon G. from KpopBreaks.com compared the song to many other of Utada's music, and felt "Hikari" "don’t even come close to her true sound and genius."[15]" --> "Although describing the song in a positive manner, Sharon G. from KpopBreaks.com compared the song to many other of Utada's music, and felt "Hikari" didn't come close to her "true sound".[15]"
• "Daniel Kalabakov from Soundtrack Central complimented Utada's singing and the instrumentation of "Hikari", but stated that he was not a fan of pop songs.[16]" --> "Despite Daniel Kalabakov from Soundtrack Central disliking pop songs, he complimented Utada's singing and the track's instrumentation."

Commercial performance

• Remove "in its first week of charting" since you already stated "to debut at number one"
• "By the end of 2002, the single was ranked at number 10 on Oricon's Annual 2002 chart; it sold 598,130 units by the end of the year.[19]" --> "By the end of 2002, the single was ranked at number 10 on Oricon's Annual 2002 chart with sales of 598,130 units.[19]"
• "cellphone" --> "cell phone"

Music video

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• "An accompanying music video was shot by her husband at the time Kazuaki Kiriya.[27]" --> "An accompanying music video was filmed by her then-husband, Kazuaki Kiriya.[27]"
• "four minute..." --> "4 minute"

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• Can you reword Naomi Gingfold's review? The part past "further commented" is too detailed and unnecessary; just take bits and junks from the quotes please

Live performances and promotion

• Nothing! :)

Simple & Clean

• Remove the "re-" before "recorded" since it's the first time it happened
• The infobox says it was released in 2002, but the lead says it was released in 2003; please check this out and fix it

Background and composition

• Remove "by Walt Disney Music Publishing" after "Musicnotes.com" please

Release and reception

• Shouldn't the released date be January 29, 2003, then? You would have to change this in the lead as well too
• The mention of it not appearing on Exodus is pretty trivial; I'd remove it
• Italicize This Is the One in the quote please

Live performances and promotions

• Remove the the link to "benign ovarian tumor" please
• Rest is great

Legacy

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• No source at the end of "and the remix versions Kingdom Hearts HD 1.5 Remix (2013) and Kingdom Hearts HD 2.5 Remix (2014)."

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• "Sparrow stated;" --> "Sparrow stated:"

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• "As a result, "Hikari" was ranked at number third with 97 votes in total.[64][65]" --> "As a result, "Hikari" was ranked at number three with 97 votes in total.[64][65]"

Track listings and formats

• "Colors / Simple & Clean 12" inch vinyl[44]" --> ""Colors" / "Simple & Clean" 12" inch vinyl[44]"

Chart and certifications

• Please separate the "Yearly" charts from the "Daily", "Weekly", and "Monthly" charts please

External links

• Please clarify the lyrics' links as there are two versions of the song: "Hikari" and "Simple and Clean"
• Alphabetize the categories please, as such:

• "2002 singles"
• "2002 songs"
• "2003 songs'
• "EMI Music Japan singles"
• "Hikaru Utada songs"
• "Oricon Weekly number-one singles"
• "Songs written by Hikaru Utrada"

End of GA Review:

An outstanding article overall. I realize this is probably one of the longest reviews I've given for a song, but I wanted to be thorough, especially given the length of this article for this particular song. I will be placing it on hold for seven days to allow for changes to be made. If you have questions or comments, please @PING me here and I'll respond very swiftly. Thanks as always and good luck! Cheers, Carbrera (talk) 03:19, 16 June 2016 (UTC).

@Carbrera: Done and dusted! Regarding the release date (as mentioned about the "Colors" single release), "Hikari" was released in a completely different time as "Simple & Clean" so whatever information is in the Background section is totally separated to the respective songs. CaliforniaDreamsFan (talk · contribs} 06:27, 21 June 2016 (UTC)